Are you too old to believe in Santa?
Saturday, November 27, 2004
Well, are you? when did you stop believing that some jolly fat guy was able to nimbly make his way across your roof and slip down your chimney without getting any soot on his bright red and white suit? Did your parents finally breakdown and give it to you straight, or did it sort just come to be known and accepted but not really talked about?
I pose these questions because of a conversation I had the other day with someone. This person doesn't believe in lying to their child and making them think there is this mysterious man from the North Pole who gives out gifts to all the good children in just a few hours. Furthermore, they think that it is pointless to make them believe in something that they will come to know later as false. Also, they hold the belief that it is better to just tell them from the beginning that their is no Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny, etc.
It is very interesting me. I don't like to lie to my children either. But, I think part of me still wants to believe it could be true. I mean, not so much that Santa Claus comes down the chimney. But that their is this inherent magic that can only be real as long as you believe. Think about it! what if everybody said, "Ahh, that's all bull$hit"? The magic would be gone. The people who create movies, and write songs, and bake cookies and carry the tradition would exist no more. There would be a lack of Christmas spirit. It is the very love of the tradition, if nothing else, that brings people together and gives children all over the world something to dream about. So they don't have to get up everyday and think, "This is it? This is all there is too life?"
Obviously I am very biased. I am not pushing Christmas from a religous perspective, though. I am just saying it is one of those things that kids love to believe in. Have you ever heard of any kid growing up to have problems as a result of finding out Santa Claus was really, only his dad? I seriously doubt it.
So anyway, tell me thoughts. What do you believe? What would you tell your kids?
posted by: ndicenso @ 1:37 PM 7 Comments | Post a Comment
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Jack, who will be turning 11 next February has always believed in Santa Claus. Christian and I were going to tell him last year...but, it never quite happened. I know he has enjoyed sharing in the "myth" of Santa Claus - even until recently with all his doubts.
Coincidentally, we were planning on talking to him about it tonight. Even if he "knows" I'm sure that he understands why we did it. He's probably just waiting on us to validate his thoughts. I'm even more sure he doesn't feel that he's been lied to. He is intelligent enough to understand the tradition surrounding the idea of Santa Claus.
I think it all depends on the child. Some kids are ready to accept the truth as young as 6 and some as old as 11. It all depends on the level of "magic" a child can take in his life. If she wants to believe, she simply will believe. Why ruin it for her? If he is ready to appreciate the Holidays for other reasons and doesn't need all the Santa stuff, then, I wouldn't force the issue.
Just my humble opinion :-)
Here is one that I think should definitely never happen, though - the Baby Delivery Stork.
David Stiller writes:
I remember a painting once where Santa Claus was placing gifts into stockings. There was a Norman Rockwell quality to the work that captured a rosy, nostalgic warmth in a slight but magical patina of gold. The most remarkable aspect was a transformation that occurred by the time Santa's arm reached his body: with careful strokes, the painter had revealed -- as if by x-ray glasses -- the jolly elf was, in fact, a father and mother, embracing near the fire and thrilled at the prospect of delighting their children. The painting struck me as a clear depiction of the spirit of Christmas; and is there a better, more apt description of Old St. Nick? Who will deny the existence of such a spirit in a loving home?
One may as well wonder if Kermit the Frog exists. We've seen the making-of footage; we've seen the puppeteer's elbow, the occasional glint of the rods that guide his green hands. As a lover of puppets and theater, I knew early on how the Muppets were performed, but that hardly broke the spell! Kermit may not be an example of Anura Ranidae proper, but, depending on how philosophical we want to get, he's certainly real. The spirit of Kermit is manifested by the loving work (sometimes the combined work) of others.
As my daughter grows, my wife and I will have the honor of bringing Santa Claus to our family. Call it a performance, but so are many of our most basic, honest communications, from hellos in the office to the rapid rehearsals of "Is there a problem, Officer?" as the blue suit nears the window.
I don't know yet, by the way, what this means in actual practice. When the times comes and I say to Meridian (in German), "Hey, off to bed, Santa's coming soon," all I really care about -- all I really hope for -- is that it will make her blossom into that beautiful smile that has already become, for me, priceless.
You shouldn't lie to your kids. If you can't find joy to share with your kids in reality, that's pretty sad no matter how eloquently justified.
David Stiller writes:
Heh, someone's reality seems less textured than mine. :) I don't see how exploring cultural traditions equates to finding no joy in reality, but to each his own.
Lying is one thing, I agree. Defining personally what a particluar concept means, then acting on that definition is another, be it religion or even Santa Claus.
right on, dave.
kathy
Hey! I never told anybody about that jolly fat guy that made his way down my chimney chute. Are you stalking me?
-Kilroy
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